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HRT injection, blood implied 

It's T day and I annoyed the nurse because I kept involuntary contracting when I was feeling her hand approaching, so she had to stab very fast but I still felt it and contracted and she said it made a mess.

But, it hurt less than usual and it tickled me when she was cleaning, so it made her laugh.

I finally got the screwdriver that allowed me to open my laptop and remove most of its dust, now it's really hard to motivate myself to do actual work, I just want to change the hard drive and nerd out about which file system I should use and which linux I should install :blobcatthinkOwO:

Make terrible mediocre things only your friends like and hug you and say they're proud of you for

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"Dry rock happens to collect these remnant volatiles day after day—as do dust particles in the atmosphere—until sudden rain releases them in a smellable burst. So the smell of rock, like the smell of approaching rain, is a tenuous essence of the living planet. A truer hellenized name would be gaia-ichor: the exhalations of Gaia, Mother Earth"

-- Harold McGee, "Nose Dive: A Field Guide to the World's Smells"

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I continued my painting! During daytime for once.
I'm supposed to add characters now, but I think I'll need to draw them and add them separately. My tiniest brush is the one I used for the stairs railing and it's definitely not precise enough. (It only has like 10 hairs! But I made a thick rough first layer.)

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Following on from my PSA about not using "get well soon" with chronically ill people, here are some suggestions I've received so far. If people have anymore, let me know.

* * * * *
I hope your symptoms improve a bit.

I hope you get some relief from your symptoms.

Oof good luck with that (in a sympathetic tone).

Hang in there X (x being persons name).

Keep surviving, comrade.

I hope things get a little better.

That's rough and I am sending love/good wishes.

* * * * *
Just remember, tone can be really important. A sympathetic tone that suggests you understand the situation, is to me, an important part of anyone's response.

#ChronicIllness #MECFS #Spoonie

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I was wondering why I can't seem to be able to concentrate on work today and finally I remembered I stayed up until after 2 (and had to wake up a 7).

Welp nobody can see me, it sounds like the perfect excuse to just stop trying for today and maybe go back to my painting or something.

Family and mental diagnostics 

Also, I talked with my psychologist about our dad and she called him narcissistic from the descriptions I made of him.
My sister's psychiatrist actually talked with our dad, he said he's maybe autistic.

So I don't know which it is, maybe both, or something else, probably we'll never know because he'll never want to admit he might need some help. But it's feels very good to hear that it wasn't young me's fault for being traumatised.

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Family and mental diagnostics 

They seem to not consider that she's probably also traumatized so I'm a bit worried for her, because she's describing emotional and even visual flash-backs, but c-ptsd is not really a thing in France.

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Family and mental diagnostics 

Her psychiatrist had first wondered if she was maybe autistic, then if maybe she had attention problems instead, and now finally they settled on having measured her IQ and found it high, whatever that's worth.

I had first wondered if I wasn't somewhere on the autism spectrum, then I had wondered I should try to get an ADHD diagnostic, and then I read more and settled on managing my c-ptsd.

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Family and mental diagnostics 

Discussed for many hours with my sister again instead of sleeping, this time she even called because there was so much to say.

She has a psychiatrist appointment during the day, I had a psychologist one, we had both talked about our familiy, and it's interesting to compare paths.

cadtm.org/Le-Franc-CFA-une-mon

Pour un peu approfondir sur le franc CFA, je vous invite à lire cette article de Saïd Bouamama sur la question.

"Durant la Seconde Guerre mondiale, c’est le Tchad de Félix Eboué qui offre un territoire et une armée au général de Gaulle. L’appel à l’empire colonial est souvent censuré quand on fait référence à son appel du 18 juin 1940. C’est Brazzaville qui devient capitale de la France libre."

Lisez moi ça vous allez en apprendre des trucs : acta.zone/amzat-boukari-yabara

I finally remembered my sister is the biggest electronics / computer hardware nerd ever, so I asked for advices about what is wrong with my hard drive. And now with her help I got the hard disk head unstuck long enough that I could make a backup, and I got the correct sdd ordered and even the correct screwdriver so I can open my laptop to change it :blobcatlove:

Stem cells donations 

Last week someone wrote about the DKMS in a group I'm in (the german bone marrow donor file, but also working in some other countries). I had never heard of it!
I registered on the same day and this morning I found the swabbing kit in my briefkasten.

I might be banned for life from giving my blood in Germany because of a computer error, but they can't prevent me from giving other stuff :blobcat:

Having friends as adults 

I like mastodon for that, I don't need to figure out how to be someone's friend, how to talk together as strangers until we are not strangers anymore, how to not just disappear and never see the other person again.

We simply coexist like floating blobs, sometimes interacting, sometimes not, learning about each other by just listening, without the awkwardness of having to try.

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Having friends as adults 

Sure now I know it doesn't work like that , adults are people and they can have friends too, but I never really thought about it. I can't really *feel* how it's supposed to work.

But I guess that mean it's not hopeless and even if I kept a single friend from before my phd I'm not hopeless and I can make more?

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Having friends as adults 

I read an article which mentioned a child meeting their parents' friends and that kind of blew my mind. Parents having friends!

My parents never mentionned friends when I was a child. Somehow I convinced myself friends are something kids get in school, and then it's too late. You move away, lose the old friends (except if they marry your siblings), and don't make new ones. Or maybe collegues, but it you don't work you never interact with people.

I got an email supposed to have important announcements.
The text of the email was: "please see this video in German Language (you can use English subtitles if needed)".
The only subtitles: "wenn ihr eure skills verbessern volt tost über klimmzüge snatch cleaner jörg marx".
:oh_no:

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